• Blog
  • Be More Kylie

    Here’s the truth. The big bad world is scary as hell. Getting out of the hospital was thrilling and exciting and terrifying all at the same time. I was almost salivating over the idea of a clean slate. Who doesn’t love the chance to start over? Most people don’t get to do it very often, […]

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  • The Fall

    Falling

    It happened in slow motion. Once I felt myself stumble, I moved my arms to try and rebalance but the elbow crutches restricted my movement. I aimed for the bed, but I was too far away and knew I wouldn’t make it. So I did the only thing that made sense. I called for help […]

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  • The Reluctant Contortionist

    contortionist

    “You need to put that in the blog” says Superman. “No,” I tell him. “It never happened.” “But it’s hilarious.” I untangle my limbs and flail about as much as I can flail about (paraplegia is a bit restrictive like that). I’m trying to remove the plastic cup from under my arse. It takes a […]

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  • The Rose Garden

    Rose Garden

    Gin and Tonic never tasted so good. We were sitting in the beer garden of a lovely English country pub, The Battle Axes in Hertfordshire. The sun was beaming down on us when Melissa pointed out the gin and tonic section on the menu. She didn’t need to point twice. She’d busted me out of […]

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  • Sink or Swim

    swim

    It started with a Zimmer frame. I’m lying on a plinth in the physio gym, feeling the effects of ten weeks worth of hospital quality sleep. In a very un-Ruthie moment, I’ve mixed up my appointment time. I run through some of my stretches while I wait patiently for nobody and I do what I […]

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  • I Want To Break Free

    Break Free

    It came on in the van just as we reversed out of the parking space. Queen gold. Those first few seconds of rhythm last just long enough for me to smile, gear myself up for the pause before I join Freddy in his opening line. ‘I want to break free-he…’ It’s a bittersweet moment. I […]

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  • Turn it Up

    Dance

    “Crank it up to 2 there Anthony.” Anthony laughs. He gives me a look that asks “Are you sure?”, answered by a swift nod. He increases the Motomed to 2nd gear. I’m trying to pedal a machine that’s a bit like an electric bike, except that I can pedal from the comfort of my wheelchair. […]

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  • Angels and Pigs

    Angel

    If you’d asked me a few months ago what my spirit animal was, I might have told you it was a panda. I’m not big into spirit animals, but I’d like to think that if such a thing existed, or if I had a Philip Pullman-esque Daemon, that it might be a kind of cute, […]

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  • The Breakdown

    crying

    It was meant as nothing more than chit-chat. A question asked in an elevator to break the silence for the 30 seconds it took to make it to the gym for physiotherapy. ‘What do you do for work?’ I felt the now-familiar wobble when the topic came up. A churning in my stomach. A stab […]